You're not the only one who felt like another "mom blog" was needed like a chronic migraine. I am right there with you. I certainly need all the help I can get, don't get me wrong. This whole mom thing is a new adventure for me. But did we really need one more person out there claiming to be an expert in "life" whose clothes are a little too perfect, whose kids are oddly well behaved, whose house looks like it's out of a magazine, with the perfect marriage & a bowl of organic whatever next tot their perfect coffee mug and cute puppy to compare ourselves to with envy? right? Barf!
Let's get serious.
I want to read something that is REAL about motherhood. I am lucky have some real hardcore friends who are happy to tell me like it is, but in those urgent, feeling like you're drowning moments that make you feel utterly alone- well except for that crying kiddo, mountain of laundry, & pile of dishes, is there anyone really being transparent?
People who know me well, or even a little, know I have a hard time sugar coating the truth. And if it seems like I'm being sweet, you're misunderstanding my sarcasm.
There are 2 things I have discovered as a Step-mom to a sweet 16 year old and a new mom to a 1 year old. The first- this mom thing is really hard. It's hard to make a plan, set a schedule, do something a bit selfish or just try to pee by myself. The minute I think we're on a roll, the big kid needs more money for whatever the next thing is & the little kid is over taking morning naps.
The second thing is I have learned as a mom is how much I really enjoy a good drink. Yep, I said it. Look, I don't recommend you drink to the point of bad decisions. You can't be the ringer at happy hour and then go pick up your rug rats from daycare. If you're at the bar until the lights come on, you still need to get up with your baby. It's called parenthood and you signed up for it. But, wine has never tasted sweeter than at this stage of my life. Pop the cork? Absolutely! I survived another day with my spawn, Let's celebrate!
The mom-on-mom hate culture is rampant. It's hard not to judge when our values are being tested all day long. Pampers or get buried in sh*tty laundry? Vaccinate or roll the dice on polio? Breast feed or formula feed and ruin your chances of being mom of the year?
That last one hit home for me. I will share more about breast feeding after several glasses of vino in another post.
A recent survey in which Beech-Nut polled 1,000 U.S. millennial moms about mom-shaming brought the issue to light, finding that 80% of moms feel they have been the target of mom-shaming & 68% of moms think the issue has gotten worse over the past five years. Worse yet, moms who have experienced shaming are more likely to shame another mom, which may indicate that mom-shaming is a trend. A bad trend. Like in the 1930's it was suggested to put your babies in cages and put them outside for fresh air.
Wait, I might work on bringing that one back.
I've included their ad below so you can see one companies effort to change mom-culture.
I hope to have many other moms join me online and in person to congregate, commiserate, & celebrate motherhood. So this little project is my next baby. Be rest assured, this one will drive me to drink too.